lamentations 3

1 I am the man who has seen affliction by the rod of his wrath.
2 He has driven me away and made me walk in darkness rather than light;
3 indeed, he has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long.

4He has made my skin and my flesh grow old and has broken my bones.
5 He has besieged me and surrounded me with bitterness and hardship.
6 He has made me dwell in darkness like those long dead.

7He has walled me in so that I cannot escape; he has weighed me down with chains.
8 Even when I call out or cry for help, he shuts out my prayer.
9 He has barred my way with blocks of stone; he has made my paths crooked.

10Like a bear lying in wait, like a lion in hiding,
11 he dragged me from the path and mangled me and left me without help.
12 He drew his bow and made me the target for his arrows.

13He pierced my heart with arrows from his quiver.
14 I became the laughing-stock of all my people; they mock me in song all day long.
15 He has filled me with bitter herbs and sated me with gall.

16He has broken my teeth with gravel; he has trampled me in the dust.
17 I have been deprived of peace; I have forgotten what prosperity is.
18 So I say, My splendour is gone and all that I had hoped from the LORD.

19I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall.
20 I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.
21 Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

22Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.

25The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
26 it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.
27 It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young.

28Let him sit alone in silence, for the LORD has laid it on him.
29 Let him bury his face in the dust— there may yet be hope.
30 Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him, and let him be filled with disgrace.

31For men are not cast off by the Lord for ever.
32 Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love.
33 For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men.

34To crush underfoot all prisoners in the land,
35 to deny a man his rights before the Most High,
36 to deprive a man of justice— would not the Lord see such things?

37Who can speak and have it happen if the Lord has not decreed it?
38 Is it not from the mouth of the Most High that both calamities and good things come?
39 Why should any living man complain when punished for his sins?

40Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the LORD.
41 Let us lift up our hearts and our hands to God in heaven, and say:
42 We have sinned and rebelled and you have not forgiven.

43You have covered yourself with anger and pursued us; you have slain withoutpity.
44 You have covered yourself with a cloud so that no prayer can get through.
45 You have made us scum and refuse among the nations.

46All our enemies have opened their mouths wide against us.
47 We have suffered terror and pitfalls, ruin and destruction.
48 Streams of tears flow from my eyes because my people are destroyed.

49My eyes will flow unceasingly, without relief,
50 until the LORD looks down from heaven and sees.
51 What I see brings grief to my soul because of all the women of my city.

52Those who were my enemies without cause hunted me like a bird.
53 They tried to end my life in a pit and threw stones at me;
54 the waters closed over my head, and I thought I was about to be cut off.

55I called on your name, O LORD, from the depths of the pit.
56 You heard my plea: Do not close your ears to my cry for relief.
57 You came near when I called you, and you said, Do not fear.

58O Lord, you took up my case; you redeemed my life.
59 You have seen, O LORD, the wrong done to me. Uphold my cause!
60 You have seen the depth of their vengeance, all their plots against me.

61O LORD, you have heard their insults, all their plots against me—
62 what my enemies whisper and mutter against me all day long.
63 Look at them! Sitting or standing, they mock me in their songs.

64Pay them back what they deserve, O LORD, for what their hands have done.
65 Put a veil over their hearts, and may your curse be on them!
66 Pursue them in anger and destroy them from under the heavens of the LORD.

~ this seems like a depressing passage especially for the finals but I was looking back at my journal and on reading verse 22-24 again, I felt the same warmth in my heart that I had when I read it last term and as I wrote it down =)
I personally haven't felt the stress from finals yet. I still can't believe the term is almost over and that I've been so blessed through frosh cell! It seems like yesterday when I was telling upper years that I wanted to lead frosh cell and then afterwards, feeling a little nervous because I felt that I would not have the experience or that "maturity". And it seemed not too long ago when I was stressing over whether or not I should apply for HKU's med school and when I finally did (realllllly last minute), I wondered whether or not I would be staying in Waterloo or bid farewell to CCF and embark on a new journey in HK.
Looking back, I've been on an amazing journey so far. From Singapore to Edmonton to Toronto to Waterloo...and I can say with certainty that God has always been by my side. I can't say that I've been through a lot of struggles compared to many others cos I've really been sheltered. Visiting Oasis (soup kitchen) on Monday night was a really good experience for me and although I didn't really get to talk to many people there, I got to hear the person-in-charge share about how he had gotten into this ministry with the homeless and less privileged group of people...and how one can see a glimmer of hope and light in each of their lives even when it seemed like just darkness because God can do amazing things in their lives too.
But back to Lamentations 3....it's just so hard to not feel the passion with which the prophet Jeremiah was crying out to the Lord, and that truly, God is our King and His love endures forever....even through sufferings! How else could Jeremiah proclaim God's great love and His compassion even when he was going through so much pain?
I still can't believe how blessed I have been this term...it's just crazily good even though I could have gotten a little more sleep, studied a little more and been less "busy" but if I could go back in time, I'd have done this again (with lots of room for improvement of course)! =)